Detailed golden rules


Do PLEASE remember the golden rules: (By all means print this off and keep the copy near at hand if SS approach! Show these rules to your lawyer or social worker to prove that you KNOW your rights!)


1: NEVER contact social services (child protection) for help or advice. You should consider very carefully before you report a partner who batters you or even a stranger who sexually assaults your young child, as if you do the SS will as often as not take your children into care (and later for adoption) to “protect them” from risk!

Unfortunately many mothers who have reported the physical or sexual abuse of a child have not been believed even when the child has initiated statements to teachers and made statements to police so they lose all their children sometimes to the alleged abuser and sometimes to care .It is better to flee rather than take that risk unless there is hard proof of the abuse.

If they have your children and you are fighting to get them back, NEVER NEVER tell social workers how you think you are going to defeat them, or what you are going to do next!Remember, without mentioning it to “them”, that even if your children are “in care” social workers do not have the legal power to stop your children going to any call box (without any money) to dial 100 and asking the operator to reverse charges and to put the call through to their parent(s) ,or from going to any public library and e-mailing you, or even meeting you for a meal as long as they return “home” to the fosterers afterwards!

If the “SS” track you down to a foreign country and try to take your children back to be put in foster care in the UK Tell those children how to resist ! They should keep quiet until “security”at the airport and then loudly accuse their escort social worker of swallowing drugs in “rubber tubes” and making them do the same ! Alternatively they can say that they heard their social worker talking to an Arab at the airport about blowing up the plane !With luck they will miss the flight at least !

Care home girl abused by 25 men in 2 years.

Care home girl abused by 25 men in 2 years | Mail Online

Last updated at 11:32 27 August 2006 The horrific story of ‘Becky‘ is highlighted in a BBC programme presented by Fiona Bruce this week allowed her to be used as a prostitute for fear their intervention might infringe her human rights A 14-year-old girl placed in a council children’s home was prostituted to a group of depraved middle-aged men because staff were powerless to stop her going out. The horrific story of ‘Becky’ is highlighted in a BBC television programme presented by Fiona Bruce this week which reveals how she was sexually abused by 25 men over two years – despite being known to social services and having been placed on the Child Protection Register. Even when she was put in a children’s home – six months after her earliest allegations of abuse -staff allowed her to be used as a prostitute for fear their intervention might infringe her human rights. If the “SS” cannot prevent a young girl in their care from working as a prostitute then surely they cannot prevent other young people they “care for” from spending the day with parents if they so choose!Remember also that children of school age have a break so you can call them and speak to them through the railings without trespassing and nobody can stop you except a judge by serving a court injunction on you that will be too late to stop you reminding your children of their real family !

Remember also that if your children suffer visible damage whilst being fostered TAKE dated and timed PHOTOGRAPHS of black eyes,bruises,cigarette burns or other injuries and give them to the police ,your MP, the NSPCC then ring Childline to make criminal complaints demanding prosecution of the perpetrators ! Don’t take “no” for an answer from any of them !!

One thing that might be of use for parents is that IF they have to have any contact from social workers via phone that they record their conversation.

I have looked at a number of smartphone apps which would do this and found one which is pretty good and “I will link you to it on the google play store which is one where you have to press a button so that the call is recorded and both sides of it are recorded:

Remember also that if children are 16 or more they will often be released from care.Sometimes however the “SS” take a particular dislike to a family and say they will keep the child until 18 when the care order must expire.

NEVER MIND! There is a way out ! If a child marries at 16 then the care order ceases !A marriage anywhere in Scotland does NOT need parental consent.Take the hint !

No need for a divorce later as the marriage can simply be annulled(cancelled) when the child reaches 18 if it has not been consummated (ie if bride and groom have not slept together)!

Remember it pays if your children MISBEHAVE with police and social workers when they try to take them to fostercare !!

“On the 22nd december 2011, an order was made for me to be taken away from my mother causing me and my mother to flee our home. After 3 weeks we were caught; my mother was locked up and bailed on abduction charges and I was taken to Cockermouth Carlisle to a foster home, my phone was taken from me;I was not allowed any contact with any of my family and I was on 24 hour supervision; not allowing me to go anywhere by myself. I remained there for 5 months and only received school work on the last month. I saw my mother twice a week for 2 hours .I was then moved to another carer at Chester-lee street to attend school and still not allowed a phone or to see any family members apart from my mother .I was placed there for 2 months. I was then placed with my aunt and was only allowed to see my mother once a week for 2 hours. All this time I was desparate to move back with my mother and to be able to see my siblings. To do this I was married at Gretna Green at the age of 16 on the 16th November 2012 .On the same night the police attended my mother’s house and were shown my marriage certificate.After stating it was all legal they left,and my clothes are being returned to me today from my aunts house who was my foster carer.

Ian I would like to thank you deeply for all your help

yours sincerely Georgie Callison ”

2: Never believe a word “they” say and always insist they put their promises down in writing. Always be pleasant and polite to social workers,but never forget they are your ENEMIES ! Remember that they may deliberately try to provoke you into shouting or violence that they will exaggerate in court leaving you with a criminal record and no children! When they shout at you forget your “pride” and look very hurt saying “why are you being like this to me?” or “I thought you were so nice until now, please don’t bully me!” Be very respectful “tongue in cheek”, but remember THEY ARE NOT POLICE so never follow their “helpful advice” especially if they say your only chance of getting your children back is to split from a partner, or parent you love and respect! They will try and turn you against each other as the “divide and rule” principle makes sure you are confused and demoralised when you lose your case and your children too!If you are told to get a different solicitor to your partner I advise you to represent yourself and let your partner keep a solicitor (or vice versa) so that at least one of you will be free in court to tell your own story and to question social workers ! Quite often they arrange deliberately awkward contact times with your children. This can result first in the loss of your job and then as a consequence of that, your accommodation also. Object firmly and forcefully in court to their plans and fight hard to keep your job and your house or appartment. Remember that when they make the threat “do as we say or we shall take your children” they intend to take them anyway no matter how much you do to please them and they just want you to make it easier for them to win their case in court by seeing psychologists and parenting assessors they have chosen themselves and who they know will give you bad reports ! IGNORE THE SS!THEY HAVE NO AUTHORITY AND NO POWER . Every time you do what they say you make it easier for them to take your children so don’t be taken in !

hello my friend, i hope you are well and healthy, an update social services gave her back after the school and them were holding her in custody all day! After her behaviour with them she was refusing much of the tests, they saw her eczema, she kicked the doctors, the police officers and told the social worker who was standing in, that she was black and ugly. At this point the situation turned social services and police protection officers agreed Amaani has behaviour issues and have said we now believe you,that you have had trouble getting her to school, that she is challenging and has the medical history that you said, we want to help you. We want to keep your family together and do not want Amaani in foster care. You parents are doing a really good job looking after her excema and all around! Basically off you go now, we will do an assessment to see if she has adhd or what. And to you my friend Thankyou and god bless and reward you once again.

kind regards and best wishes

shahnaz x


Children should only be taken if a parent has been charged with a crime against a child or has committed one . The process of dealing with such cases in a criminal court rather than a civil one would also DETERMINE THAT FAULTS BY A PARENT WOULD BE JUDGED NOT ON PROBABILITIES BUT BEYOND REASONABLE DOUBT . Parents would then automatically have the right to ask for a hearing in front of a jury if they risked losing their children long term or permanently.

These reforms would stop most of the present injustices,so it is worth repeating how unjust the family courts have become.

What can I do if my adult child is sectioned?

Unfortunately there has been a recent tendency for over-eager social workers to take adults of all ages who have learning difficulties or other slight impairments and take them from loving parents to be put in special private homes run for excessive profit. There are many sad stories of adults with Down’s Syndrome and other disabilities that do not prevent them with proper support from leading normal lives especially when they are supervised by or actually live with loving parents. Here is the link to the story of how to deal with the situation if your adult child or ageing parent is snatched from you, sectioned and then given drugs to accentuate their disability and make them seem helpless.

3: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER sign any documents they present to you, even if they say “you have to!” Social Workers rely on BLUFF. In reality they have NO POWER and no right to threaten you or give you orders of any kind! Only a COURT via an order from a judge can give you orders, and you always have the opportunity to contest those orders in court either before or after they are given to you. No matter what threats,or promises they make, you can be 100% sure that if you get intimidated into signing they will break their word and expect you to keep your’s! So, DO NOT SIGN! Answer “yes”, “no” or “I don’t know” to questions WITHOUT further explanations that could be twisted to be used against you! If the “SS” do not have enough evidence against you do not “cooperate” by supplying them with what they need even if they threaten you.If your enemies run out of ammunition ,do NOT send them over a box of bullets to help them out ! Once the SS have applied for a care order remember their main object is NOT the welfare of the child ,it is to WIN their case against you ! Disregard any threats that you must “do as they tell you “. Be polite and even apologetic when you refuse to obey them !

4: Never, never agree to let your children go into foster care (especially if they say it is TEMPORARY OR VOLUNTARY) Never “agree” the thresholds even if you are advised that this will ensure the return of your children, because if you do you will have admitted neglecting or abusing your child and the only question left will be to decide if you have really repented and are capable of “change”! Usually the answer is no! Sometimes your own lawyer may tell you to agree the thresholds and/or agree to an interim care order otherwise “you will never see your children again! “That is a wicked lie designed to save the lawyers work and to help you LOSE your children! Sometimes lawyers will tell you there is no need for you to give evidence as they will speak for you; that way you may find you have lost your children very quickly without being allowed to say a word, so BEWARE!Most of the “legal aid lawyers” in the family courts are rightly known in the trade as “PROFESSIONAL LOSERS”!! Many of them pretend to work for you when in fact they are really on the side of the Local Authority.

Often alas you will have to sack your lawyers and represent yourself simply because they will not let you speak in court!If you are a couple just sack one lawyer so that one of you can represent yourself and say what you want in court whilst the other person can keep a solicitor to see to all the paper work ! Never admit to social workers (who are your ENEMIES) that you have been at fault in even the smallest possible way,(they certainly will never admit to you that they were ever at fault!). You must never lie in court, but you should never never admit to any fault on your part unless forced to do so by a direct “yes or no” type question in court. Above all,NEVER NEVER plead guilty to something you have not done simply because they promise to” bind you over” or let you off with “a caution” if you do and threaten you with prison if you refuse !This just means they have insufficient evidence and are trying to trick you into pleading guilty so they can win their case !



!You must never disobey a court order by taking abroad a child already in care, but if you are pregnant and threatened neither a court nor the “SS” can stop you leaving the country before the baby is born!If the children are already with you ,but you feel menaced by social services try to leave the country BEFORE any notice of care proceedings is served on you. Ireland is easiest and is cheap to get to.( No forced adoption allowed there,and if you take the ferry no passport needed!) or give good information so you can discreetly book on line! .The “SS” rarely work at weekends so a departure on Friday evening is a good way of avoiding altercations and clashes with frustrated social workers ! You are however advised to notify the Irish police shortly after your safe arrival as otherwise you might be posted in the UK as a missing person .Alternatively you canchange your name by declaration before a uk solicitor and register for a new N.H number and that way disappear in your new country. Spain,France,and Italy are good countries to go to ,especially if you have family or contacts there and best of all is N.Cyprus ,100%safe !

Please note once more that I am happy to refund travel expenses for pregnant mothers and partners to European countries, but cannot support families after arrival though I usually can pass on some useful contacts. Do not land in a foreign country with no personal resources expecting to collect benefits ! That just won’t happen.You need outside support to survive if you have no cash and no job lined up.Sometimes a father remains in uk earning money to support the mother and baby in their new home;others rely on extended family support. The “SS” may eventually track you down,and if they do you must stay and fight them in the courts and WIN.Do not panic or run away as most (but not all ) who stay to fight do win !

Of course you may prefer to lay low for a little while ,in which case keep a very low profile and confide in noone ; not even family in the uk as they may be pressurised by police and ss to reveal your whereabouts but what they do not know they cannot tell! !

I do however advise you to report to the authorities (police and ss) of whatever country you have fled to.Here is advice from a mother who fled the uk to have her baby in Spain:-

I have learned an awful lot by my mistakes. I would advise anyone fleeing the UK to be up front with the authorities in the new country. I so wish I had done this. I was afraid they would believe the British over me or would contact the British. However what I have found out is that other countries appreciate the honesty and will do more to assist you if you are honest with them.

  1. All ties need to be cut with the UK especially financial. 2. You must register properly in the new country. 3. You must ensure that the child is registered properly in the new country. 4. You should try and get a social security number and employement in the new country even if it means starting a small business and being out of pocket tax wise.

In addition to points 1-4 ABOVE anyone going abroad to give birth should take with them in addition to their passports
1. Birth Certificate 2. Marriage Certificate if ever married 3. Divorce papers if divorced 4. EU health card

I often refund parents “travel costs” so that PREGNANT women can escape to Ireland(no passports needed) and other European countries where there is NO FORCED ADOPTION.Whatever the facts of the case FORCED ADOPTION is always wrong so I will always help pregnant women to avoid having their babies snatched at birth to feed the ever greedy” adoption industry” When outraged lawyers,judges,and social workers accuse me of “meddling in complex family cases without knowing all the facts” My reply is to repeat once again that FORCED ADOPTION is always wrong no matter what the facts .Please note however that although I never refuse to pay travel expenses for any pregnant women and children menaced by social services and escaping to Europe I OBVIOUSLY CANNOT SUPPORT THEM AFTER ARRIVAL but I can usually pass on a few useful contacts.

Remember you are usually safe from UK social services if your baby is born in Ireland (or nearly anywhere in Europe except the UK ). Of course you must NOT return with the baby to the UK yourself as it could be taken from you.

Here is the proof!

Hello all from the family in France who beat Norfolk S.S ! We wish to give our heartfelt encouragement to anyone suffering appalling treatment at the hands of those who are supposedly employed to help ! It was a long nightmare for us but for many it is longer and even harder , if their is any advice we think would help it is to remember you are better than them and to always hold your head up high and stay calm. This will help dispell anything negative they formulate or exaggerate about your character , prove them wrong! Also importantly reach out for as much help as you can and accept that help just as we did. Their ARE people out their (like Ian) who care an awful lot and the awareness is growing about whats going on. If you suspect your solicitor is not on this wavelength or acting in your best interests sack them instantly , if they say you cant they are almost certainly working against you , not for you and we should know ! Keep believing in whats right and don’t give up the fight ! Our best wishes are with you all contact us using this email if you are in a similar situation and need help or advice.

, Joe and Marie

Dear Ian,

My name is Laura . You may remember my case, although you mainly dealt with , my childrens father. When we last spoke, the uk SS had lied to Irish SS, and stole my children from me, bringing them back to the UK under 56 day ICO’s.

Well…..I filed an application for leave to appeal, with the Royal Courts of Justice, on the 10th Jan, as litigant in person, and yesterday, I appeared, in person, for an oral hearing. I stood before LJ Thorpe, LJ McFarlane, and LJ Moses.

The LA hired a barrister to fight against me.

After a hearing lasting jut over an hour, the 3 LJ’s made a judgement that…

The LA had acted unlawfully.
The orders made were draconian in nature, and cruel to the extreme

And that they were overturning the orders, from the date they were made, and returning my children to my care. They also suggested I look into civil action, to recover expenses etc.

LJ Moses also said, as part of the judgement, that my bundle is by far one of the most sophisticated pieces of evidence and law, he has seen in many years. He then went on to say, that that is high praise indeed, given those who stand before him.

I replied that I am no barrister, or solicitor, he replied I should be. I said, all I want, is to be a mum.

As I type, my children are tucked up in their own beds, safe and sound, and away from the clutches of those awful awful people. Justice actually worked. I have tears as I write this. Thank you so so much, for all your help, and advice, and time.

I wanted to call and tell you, but am aware of the time, and did not want to inconvenience you any more than I already have.

You are amazing.


The Irish social services are mostly a friendly bunch who will not take too much notice if the UK lot contact them and rubbish you;They may even take your baby for a little while as a precaution but you normally get it back pretty quickly and never never risk the horror of forced adoption.

Sorry we have not been in touch for a while, but I wanted to wait until we had some good news for you. Frankel was born on 31-12-12. He was 8lb 4oz and was well.
I’ve named him after the race horse the winner!! The unbeatable.
Within 10 minutes the Gardi came in and removed him stating we had flied a UK court order which was to remove the baby at birth as we were highly dangerous and the baby is to be sent back s they had a care order on Frankel to And also there was a order stating that we were not to leave the uk.
I did not see Frankel for 3 days as ordered by the UK SS. We finally got to court where the uk and HSE were assisting each other to get Frankel on a Sec 47 to send him to the UK. Part of the care plan was read out in court and the judge was disgusted!!! The demanded why I’d not been able to see Frankel and why did the plan say 3 hours a week contact? He asked the HSE worker if she thought this was morally right and she said no, then he replied well this child is an Irish citizen we are in Ireland and we do things our way not what someone over seas says!!! We got to see him every day at the office supervised five days aweek. We got our own solicitor and raised the cash selling our belongings. When we went to court a second time the HSE asked the uk for these court orders to present to the court here. They sent a barrister to say that there was no such order!! So uk had lied to the police in uk, Ireland and Interpol. They saw that in the paper work sent that I had done nothing wrong since 97 and I was a child in their care!! The HSE said they would work with us and commended us for our composhar When they took Frankel and how calm we have been during all proceedings and dealings with them. They cut back supervised visits and we have them in our home now. I’m off to a unit in cork to get the treatment I need for my childhood traumas with Frankel and Jon can stop for 3 nights a week with us. Jons got a head chef job in Skibbereen. So everything’s turning out good. The only downer now is they found that Frankel has a hole in his heart which he’s having a op in 7 weeks time over in Dublin to repair with open heart surgery. But we positive and know he’s in safe hands here. Basically the HSE here have got all these reports from uk and have to do what they are doing but they can’t believe in all my life after removing my other children that I’ve never been offered this help! All I’ve ever been offered is at court when I lost Daisy last year the social worker walked up to me and handed me a leaflet which was for post adoption counciling!!!!
Any way all in the past now!! Also I am very happy if you wanted to give my number to other victims going though what we have been though. To offer support and advise. My number is 086 452 1825 I’ve forgot the Irish code! Thank you very much for all your help!

hi ian just to say thank you again, this is ians email address if possible could you please only use our email and only give our first names out and not use our last name many thanks ian and tracy

BEWARE the Sunnybank Hotel Glasnevin as it is half-owned with a social worker who cooperates wtih the Social Services in the UK. Stay clear of this place at all costs!!!

IMPORTANT:- The European Court of Justice recently decided that Britons living abroad are still entitled to claim welfare benefits from the UK !!

Here is a Mumsnet thread re adoption in Ireland. A married couple can’t give up a child for adoption even if they want to!! A single mother can give up her child for adoption, presumably for a fairly obvious reason. The Irish State cannot forcibly adopt a child against the wishes of a married or single mother!! :-

Here are a few who have fled to Ireland and elsewhere and who will help others !


Hi, been awhile since i last contacted you. i am glad to say i had my son a little boy, oliver phillip weighted 2.22kg he was born early following a c section on the 21st april 2012 . on the 18th of may 2012 i was allowed to bring my son home even though social services contact the social services here. i am on a register and monitored however you wouldnt know it its more a help than anything like the uk system. my son has never been separated from me and i am excelling as a parent, it has left the social services here somewhat at a loss to understand my past. i have been given support as i was dignoised with post truamtic stress disorder from my children being taken from me.
my son oliver has made me feel again and slowly i am beginning to trust again. everyday i wake with a smile on my face. i have two other children but once i have the strength i intent to make an application for change of circumstances and be reunited although my struggle is far from over i have proved that i can parent. i asked for a chance and i have been given one and i am geatful and a little sad as my daughters have missed out on all the love i could have given them.
i would just like to say thank you, for your site without it i would of been isolated , in pain unable to see a liight or a way to change my life, in and out of relationships trying to fill a void left by the loss of my beautiful girls.
thankyou for taking my calls when i was ever so scared and afriad i would loss my son too
and the money you gave me was much appreciated and one day i hope i can help others like me.
ireland is now my home to leave the past behind. I would like you to tell my story so that those without a partner can know that there is a way for them to. please find attached a photo of oliver phillp(my son) and i.
oh, please could you let jullia know i’m okay i lost my phone and her number…
kindest regards




Hey Ian,

Sorry its took so long to reply, but i wanted to thank you for your help and the money you gave us. So kind.

We are now settling in, many trials along the way as the Laos way of doing things is a whole new world. All fine though. Kids are fit and well and it looks like the SS have given up. Apparently heads a rolling due to this.

The judge at the “urgent Directions Hearing” they requested, laid the blame fully at there door. The guardian said he doesnt know how we did so well with the constant pressure and attacks we were facing. He apparently told the SS back in July to stop there action against us.

He is disgusted but fully understands our reasons.

Anyway, when i have time im going to do a full story for your site.

If you have anyone in a similar mess, if they can get here, i will happily provide assistance with 12month family visa’s and accomodation while they set up.


David Willcox

Dear Ian,

Firstly, i want to take this opportunity to thank you ever so much for the invaluable advise and dedication that you gave three years ago when i wrote to you about a child who was taken away from my friend because she was smacked. I wrote to you two weeks before she was to be adopted, having had stayed in foster care for over a year. With your advice, the adoption never took place, instead, the family were offered parenting courses and supported to recreate the lost bond. They are now living together as a family and its all thanks to you.

Thank you


hello ian, i dont no if you remember us but just over a year ago you helped me and my husband am tracy and my husband is ian, i was pregnant when i came over here and my boy is now a year old ,i was wondering if you could contact us to let you now how things are going x

Hello Ian,

I don’t know if you remember me. I am originally from Germany and run to italy from london with my 2 Boys.

From there we went to Ireland. Anyhow we have been lucky so far. I found a decent Job on my 2nd Day here. We were staying with someone in a Studio flat for 1 Month. My job gave me 500 euro up front so we could move in a own flat. so we were in a 2 bed flat for 2 month and now we moved in a 5 bed house just outside dublin. that is the reason why i am contacting you. we have space to take in 1 or 2 families in emergency. they need to tidy after themselfs and no drugs or smoking in the house. please do not give out my e-mail adress. they should contact you and you can ring me or mail me. we only have 2 month left to become residents and i don’t want to chance it.

i know that there is an issue for the families to receive benefits here. there is a way around it. register selfemployed on low income. they could make up any trade and keep book. is easy to do. once they selfemployed they can apply for everything. i have not applied for anything yet and is hard at times. but i rather stay save. the house we live in doesnt really have a adress and no neighbours. vincent de paul charity helps with essentials. thats where we got cookery, bedding and taols from. they give you up to 30 euro voucher a week when you need it and help for school uniforms and books.

thank you for the brief help at the time.


PS if you have couples where 1 is working, then only the person who doesnt work should leave while the other can support the person with the child. they need to get a prepaid creditcard . best if a friend gets it as of the name. get 2 cards from 1 account. 1 for her 1 for him. the one left behind in the uk can topup the card in the money shop or postoffice. while one person is here establishing a new life the other can apply for jobs in ireland. to apply for the jobs is better to use a internet dongle as is not registred on anyones name and noone can track your movements as they don’t know the dongle nr. when either the person here is ready or the other found a job via internet they can reunite in safty with much less stress and hussle. noone is perfect and perfect parents don’t exist. the once who say they are perfect are the worst parents from what i have seen. we all make mistakes and have our own ways which were pased down to us from our parents. SS needs to hire people who have children and not hire children who don’t have a clue. lets beat the system if we can’t change it.


Hi Ian,
I dont know if you remember but we spoke in October last year and you advised us,due to Worcestershire social services bullying tactics to leave the uk immediately for Ireland…well we took your advice and we did.
It was extremely difficult the first 2weeks until we got the kids into school but now,nearly 4 months on we have never been happier but,isn’t there always a but,the SS over there will not let go and are threatening to extradite my kids back to the uk…let me explain…when we arrived hereafter obtaining PPSnumbers for us all SS found out where we were living(in the middle of nowhere)and sent the Gardai and Ireland’s SS to see us.they spoke to us for 20 minutes and left but we agreed to let them see the kids when they wanted to….well,after seei g my kids TWICE,and the Gardai making ONE unannounced visit SS here are of the notion that there’s no problem with my kids and are going to close our case in the next month,can I just say Worcestershire SS PHONEDmy eldest daughters principal DEMANDING that the kids are brought back to England immediately as they are at risk of emotional harm,the principal argued with the social worker and told her that she had met all my family and the is NOTHING wrong with any of the kids and their heavy handed tactics very nearly destroyed a perfectly normal family,she also old them that in her opinionWorcestershire SS have handled our case deplorably and the UKs loss is her gain as my daughter is a brillliant student who is learning FIVE Languages, my daughter has also been moved up a year due to her intelligence and will be doing her leaving certs 2years early,not bad for a child who is at ‘risk’ is it?! My kids are also on the Irish foreign births register due to my family coming from Dublin and we will all be obtaining irish passports in the near future.
We love it here Ian,my kids are so happy at home and at school .Many thanks Ian
Sara and Wayne twigandbones@ymail.comPS We found very reasonably priced accommodation near the N.Irish borde via an agebncy called “DAFTIE”IMPORTANT:- I reassured Wayne and Sara that the ss from the UK were just making empty threats to try and upset the family,as they can do absolutely nothing if a family leaves the UK BEFORE any notice of court proceedings has been received.IJ a helpline for mums who flee to Ireland that you can reach by simply clicking in to the website of mumshouse !Try the link below if the one above does not work;

Parents of Irish citizen children

On 8 March 2011 the European Court of Justice (ECJ) ruled in the Zambrano case C 34/09, that an EU member state may not refuse the non-EU parents of a dependent child who is a citizen of, and resident in, an EU member state the right to live and work in that member state.

The Department of Justice and Equality is reviewing the cases of non-EEA parents of Irish citizen minor children which may meet the criteria specified in the Zambrano case.

The links of the sites where it explains that the law has changed for children born to foreign nationals after 2005. The first site is from the department of foreign affairs and talks about the citizenship criteria and the second is from Irish Citizenship information which half way down has a nice little table which explains who is and who isn’t entitled.


The Grand Chamber of the European Court of Human Rights Decided( above) that the best interests of the child would be the deciding factor to determine whether that child could remain in Ireland. Previously the question concerned “habitual residence”.

Neulinger & Shuruk v. Switzerland

A Momentous and Disturbing Ruling in Europe on the Hague Abduction Convention

183 days(6 months) residence to claim full benefitsin Ireland .

Even better is North Cyprus where there is a large British colony and NO EXTRADITION treaty though local police can expel serious  criminals ! Fly from most UK airports but if you think you might get stopped there then it is 100% safe if you fly there from Ireland.




Dear Ian

You asked me to write a letter for publication on your website after I spoke to you recently, about my move with my two children to Northern Cyprus in order to escape the threats from Social Services. My children who are now aged 9 and 10 were allegedly “at Risk of Emotional Harm” following longstanding disputes with my ex-partner, whom my children have had no contact with since 2006. As Northern Cyprus (known as the TRNC) was invaded by Turkey in 1974 it is not recognised as a country outside of Turkey and for that reason the jurisdiction of the United Kingdom has no power to extradite you from here as this country is not part of the Hague Convention and neither the EU. Since the 1974 invasion Cyprus has had two governments (one Turkish and one Greek Cypriot), and it is only the Greek Cypriot part of Cyprus that is a member of the EU. I believe there are approximately 10,000 British Expats living in Turkish controlled Northern Cyprus (you will find them everywhere!), and renting a property is extremely cheap. I currently have a 3 bedroom apartment in Kyrenia overlooking the sea to the front and mountains to the rear with a huge shared swimming pool for £350 per month. The cost of cars however is not cheap at approximately double/triple what you would have to pay in the UK for a comparable car, but you can still find something decent for under £4k and petrol is just over £1 per litre. It is possible to find work here, but the wages are not high, but it is also possible to open a Company either alone (with a massive deposit as security) or with a Turkish partner. If you need to escape then this is a great place to live with sunshine most of the time, but in order to move here, at least initially, you would need to have some capital, and you also need to show that you have capital in a local bank in order to obtain a residence visa (about 10k). There are a few other single women here with children but it would be difficult moving here if you are single with very young children as there is no childcare provision, albeit much easier for a couple. There are several private English speaking schools and the fees are much lower than private schools in the UK. However, there are also many Turkish speaking State schools that are free and I know several people sending their children to those. Crime is virtually unheard of here. There are lots of supermarkets, we drive on the left as in the UK and if you want to cross to the Greek side for some serious retail therapy then it is now easy to do so from the capital Nicosia. If you can fund the cost then this is definitely the place to be, but it really only can be contemplated if you can fund the move. If you would like any further information then please contact me through Ian Josephs.

Here is a video that my children made for Social Services who were nit picking about their weights as a reason for them being on the Child Protection Register….. And by doing so, were causing them much anxiety. Unbelievable what Social Services are doing to normal families and all I had wanted was my children’s deadbeat father to pay child support that he was legally obliged to pay, only I got accused of harassing him for sending 2 emails on the subject for the first time in nearly 4 years, and prosecuted for that too…. The right and left arms of the legal system are clearly not connected. It is ridiculous that tax payers money is being wasted like this, and that I had to go to such an extreme to protect my children and leave all my friends and life behind in the UK after things clearly took a turn for the worse in early April. One last piece of advice is to get yourself new passports as I did and also bring a laptop.


Hi, from C
Just to let you know that if any single mother or small family are seeking cheap accommodation in a country where they will be entirely free from the threat of the Social Services I can let them know of a large number of available apartments in a gorgeous location in Northern Cyrpus (no extradition, no diplomatic relations, big on family, all speak English), close to all amenities and next to the sea. The choice is of 2-bedroom or 3-bedroom apartments. 2 bedroom apartments start at just £200-250 per month and 3-bedroom apartments are £300 per month. All spacious and furnished to a high standard in a green location with swimming pools and playgrounds and gyms and with many ex-pat neighbours with children.

P.s. If a single parent or couple with one or two child were to contact me I could meet them at the airport and put them up for a couple of nights (we have a spare room) and find them accommodation if they can afford £250-£300 per month for 2/3 bed apartment. Alternatively I can rent the apartment on their behalf, thus giving them total anonymity if they can pay £300-£350 per month for the apartment. There are many apartments here and they are perfect for single mothers and small families from the UK to live and find work in the town nearby. They would be as happy as we are.
C.     You can keep my offer of help up on your website. But please remove my email address and instead of the email address please write that they can apply to you for my phone number and use it once they have arrived in this country
Dear Mr Josephs

Your website has been of great help to me I was wondering if you could point me in the right direction of getting my story publicized as all other avenues are now closed to me to get justice. My daughter Taylor was adopted by Stoke on Trent social services in 2011 she was 3 years old at the time for risk of future emotional harm. The evidence they bought before the court was questionable to say the least. Taylor was placed for adoption within 8 weeks of the placement order. They rushed to place her so I couldn’t get her back as I was heavily pregnant with my second child who was not taken at birth after I found your website and followed your advice to the letter . The Judge said when I contested Taylors adoption that if she wasn’t already placed she would of been coming back home as I had a child living with me with no concerns I couldn’t contest the original evidence the local Authority produced in a contested adoption hearing. I now have two children and my nephew who I have fostered (which is a major turn around for the LA) living with me and  we are only 2 years down the line non of them are under any kind of social services involvement I have had assessments in regards to my nephew and there are no concerns what so ever. I would really like to share my story as I feel like I have been given a life sentence with no chance of appeal for something I didn’t do as there was no way I could disprove a social worker with a crystal ball. Now we are in the future and those events what they said were a certainty haven’t happened and there is no way of putting things right. A convicted criminal at least has a chance of justice. I have not only lost my daughter but also have to live with the stigma in the mean time, whilst looking forward to the day she turns up at my door knowing that she probably wont believe me when I tell her what happened. The post box contact is little comfort as Social services and the adoptive parents use it as some kind of insurance policy for later on when the child starts to question why they were adopted. I am lucky as at least I have my 3 children thanks to your advice but it doesn’t make up for the fact that all my children should be here.  I am now in a position where I feel that I could help other people who are in the same position by telling my story without reprisals from the LA.

Many Thanks

Hailie Cooper
You knew me about 5 years ago as Fran Lyon.
I just wanted to get in touch and let you know that all cases with respect to Molly and I have been closed and we are now very happily settled in Sweden.
Molly’s father instigated a series of Private Law proceedings against us and caused some serious problems but he has now withdrawn them because a social services report produced here found that it was in Molly’s best interests that I retain sole custody of Molly.
The state of play at the moment is:
– Child protection have completed and closed their assessments. – Attachment assessments have been completed and no concerns were noted. – Psychiatric assessments of myself have been completed and no diagnosis made. – My health condition has been accurately diagnosed and is now managed without the need for hospital admissions. – I have sole custody and the father (who British social services sought to arrange visitation with and parental responsibility for) has been denied unsupervised visitation, and has been informed that social services will never support joint PR (or custody as it’s known here). – Molly’s health visitor, doctor, nursery and social workers (though she no longer has one) all agree she is a happy little girl developing normally.
I was the same person here as I was in the UK. And Molly was the same child. The history was the same and the documents were the same. The only difference was the systems involved.
You helped me a great deal by making me realize the system I was fighting, and the insanity within it, and making me realize that it really was possible to get out.
I don’t know how often you advise people these days. But Sweden is certainly an option for anyone looking to get out, who has EU citizenship. It can be a protracted affair, particularly when private law gets in the mix. But there are jolly good lawyers out here who are not afraid to take on the system. But by and large you don’t need them, as the system here is just so very different.
Aside from the emotional and psychological cost, it has obviously imposed a huge financial burden, and that would have to be a consideration for anyone seeking to move here. But to my mind, it’s worth it. It’s possible to work here, to study here and to achieve a reasonable standard of living reasonably quickly.
Thank you so much for your help. You provide a lifeline when it seems there is none.
fran lyon.


Hello Ian following your advice concerning the ss and their attempt to take our children from us because they say that our children were or had and were of risk of suffering emotional abuse we would like to let you know that we have indeed now fled from the uk and are now living in ROI.
It has taken some time for us to find a property to rent and to get the children into school.
The family is just starting to feel a little better and hopefully soon we can get over the huge trauma of what the ss has done to this family and most of all the emotional trauma that they have caused our children to experience and go through. .
You are more than welcome to print this email on your website
We came into this country by boat and found the whole process extremely stress full from making the initial decision to leave after consulting you and watching the way the ss was deliberately contorting what was said to them by family and by my husband to comming into this country with little or no info on how to go about getting the help we needed.
We did contact some of the contacts you gave us to talk to and one or two were particularly help full to us with information that we needed to find a property.
If any one else is considering what we have had to do for the sack and safety of their children then please don`t hesitate to give them my email and mobile number as where we are living their are a few properties available to let and we could point some of them in the right direction for these properties.
What i would say is to make sure that you do have some Euros before entering this country and also make sure that they apply min 2 weeks before they go for an Ehic Card as this will help them if they have an medical emergency in this country.
They also need to make sure that they bring all Birth Certificates, Passports if they don`t have one for a child i strongly recommend that they obtain one before hand and they can do this by booking a same day passport application at a passport office it costs more but provided everything is correct they will have the passport the same day.
This is what we did little did we know at the time that it would be provident to do so as when you apply for the PPSN in this country you need to have two forms of id one being the birth certificate or marriage certificate the other being a passport of driving licence. You need the PPSN numbers to get your child into school, to register at the health center ect even to open a bank account in this country and to work ect.
If they are on benefits they need to ring up in the uk and state that they are just seeking information that way they do not have to give their name or national ins number to the benefit office, hmrc office to find out if their benefits can be transported out to the ROI because some benefit can.
Any body needing help on this can contact us by email
One of the first things they should also consider doing on arrival in this country if they have come with a car is to fuel it up and also to go into a local vodaphone shop, Meteor Shop, Tesco, Argos and purchase themselves a prepaid phone as uk mobile phones dont always work here and cost a fortune to use in the first place.
Best mobile to use is the Tesco Mobile cause they double it your top up so if you purchase 10 Euros they the give you an extra 20 Euro Call time credit which is mighty usefull.
Hope this helps. Kindest Regards
Lynda and family 07821663335

See also Angela Wileman’s “survival guide” reproduced a bit later on ( just scroll down).She escaped, beat the ss, and survived even though she had to flee from the UK to Sweden,and from there to Spain and finally with the “SS” still in hot pusuit to Ireland where the SS finally gave up wasting public money hounding her !!

5: When possible refuse to be assessed by so called “experts, “(psychiatrists, therapists, psychologists, counsellors, professionals, and the like)inevitably selected by those who are hostile to you. You should however agree if you are advised to do so by a judge.If it is only the “SS” who demand an assessment insist that your children are returned first as otherwise the process will take place in an artificial atmosphere with you as parents emotionally distressed because your children have been taken.If for some reason that is not possible request at least that you share in the choice of “expert” so as to avoid the “regulars” who appear in court time after time and always find that parents have “personality disorders” or similar mental issues. Remember that if the “SS” insist on these assessments their sole purpose is to gather sufficient evidence to help them win their case against you in court!If you talk a lot and do not listen to them they will say you have mental problems or “PERSONALITY DISORDERS”,so be “quiet and attentive” during assessments. Try not to answer questions with more than 5 or 6 words (they write down anything unhelpful you may let slip). Try indeed to answer “yes” or “no” whenever possible.

Remember to be the OPPOSITE of what whatever faults the ss attribute to you !If they say you are too aggressive,act timid and vice versa!If they say you are too emotional act “cool” and vice versa!

Your whole tone” in Court “must be one of “sweetness and light” regretting that your children were mistakenly taken and that THEY (not you) suffered harm and anguish as a result! DO NOT LOSE your case by being hostile in court towards social workers and especially towards the judge !!Eagerly propose a supervision order as a much more suitable alternative for your children than fostering or forced adoption.Emphasise that you have nothing to hide and that if a SUPERVISION ORDER is granted instead of fostering or adoption, your door will always be open to health visitors and social workers wishing to check the well being of your children ! Your whole case must be that YOUR CHILDREN have suffered harm (not yourself) and that you are taking action for their sake not for your own! If you are accused of “being unable to work with the professionals”, reply that you will work 100% with them if they say their objective is to reunite your family by eventually returning your children, but that it is unfair to expect you to work with anyone whose objective declared to the court is to put your children into care or worse still have them adopted!

NEVER COMPLAIN NEVER EXPLAIN! Complaints about individual social workers ,lawyers,or policemen are a waste of time as they investigate themselves and you risk being diverted from the more important task of keeping or recovering your children.Complaints against social workers often result in them taking your children or redoubling their efforts to keep them if they already have them !They are a vindictive lot !

Never explain or elaborate when questioned as this only gives extra material to those who wish to discredit you. If asked when,why,or whether you did something or went somewhere,answer “yes”,”no” “I don’t know”or “I don’t remember” but never try to explain WHY you went there or did something (unless asked specifically) and even then reply “because I thought it the best thing to do at the time” or something similar as explaining and talking too much will enable a crafty local authority barrister to seize on something you let slip and turn your case from winning into losing !

Never make angry personal attacks on anybody or threaten to sue the “SS” or police at a later date, as it just makes YOU sound bad.They may even seize on your resentment as an excuse to diagnose you with PARANOIA !

If you are accused of wild conspiracy theories and thinking all the world is against you,then replythat social workers are desperate to COVER UP THEIR MISTAKES IN YOUR CASE RATHER THAN ADMIT THEM; also that you can’t help believing what the most senior family judges say !

By all means quote this extract sorrowfully from “The Times” April 13th 2010,saying even the most dedicated social workers can make bad mistakes !

“Lord Justice Wall (The Senior family court judge) said that the determination of some social workers to place children in an “unsatisfactory care system” away from their families was “quite shocking”.In a separate case on which Sir Nicholas Wall also sat, Lord Justice Aikens described the actions of social workers in Devon as “more like Stalin’s Russia or Mao’s China than the West of England” !

Summary of how to talk with psychologists etc or how to state your case when representing yourself in court

To avoid accusations of mental problems OR TO PRESENT YOUR CASE IN COURT act as follows:-

1:- Do NOT speak a lot or go off the subject chosen for discussion by the psy OR BY THE COURT;

2:-NEVER slag off anybody or complain about anybody past or present ;Say only that those who took your children made a terrible mistake ! Do NOTget angry about anything !

3:-Say ONLY that your children have suffered being deprived of a mother NOT that you have suffered !

4:-Listen carefully when the psy OR HOSTILE BARRISTER speaks to you and NEVER interrupt when he/she is talking however much you want to !

5:- Try NOT to complain about anything especially your parents or your childhood as psys blame everything on childhood incidents!

6:- Answer all questions where possible by YES or NO or possibly” I don’t know” or “I can’t remember” ! NEVER go in for long explanations or excuses and never admit to wrongdoing because if you do they will make your past admitted mistakes the highlight of the report !

If a judge tries to ridicule your testimony by asking “Do you think we are all in a conspiracy to take your child”? Answer”No of course not ! It’s just that social workers never change their minds once they form an opinion even if later events show they were wrong .Because, like birds of a feather social workers,judges, guardians ,family court solicitors and their carefully chosen “experts” always “stick together” never admitting a mistake and fanatically eager to cover up rather than rectify any errors of judgement they have made .

They stick to their original story come what may to COVER UP THEIR MISTAKES and the courts nearly always side with them.Ask ” Who am I to disagree with the senior family court judge when he says the behaviour of social workers is shocking?”These judges needquoting again and again!

Family torn apart in 15-minute court case by Judge James Orrell Lord Justice Thorpe said on Appeal “I am completely aghast at this case.There is nothing more serious than a removal hearing,because the parents are so prejudiced in proceedings thereafter.Once you have lost a child it is very difficult to get a child back.” The hearing above lasted only 15 minutes after a doctor “expressed the opinion” that bruising in the ear of one of the three children looked as though it was caused by pinching .The parents were not allowed to give any evidence!Their three children had all been forcibly removed until they were ordered to be returned by Lord Justice Thorpe .

(Extract from the TIMES April13th 2010)

“Lord Justice Wall (The Senior family court judge) said that the determination of some social workers to place children in an “unsatisfactory care system” away from their families was “quite shocking”.In a separate case on which Sir Nicholas Wall also sat, Lord Justice Aikens described the actions of social workers in Devon as “more like Stalin’s Russia or Mao’s China than the West

BEWARE the “Official Solicitor” ! If you get too upset or too excited the judge may decide you are not capable of instructing a solicitor or representing yourself and will appoint this parasite to represent you instead.He is by law forbidden to put on a case for you as his job is simply to agree with the “SS” ,to refuse to let you speak, and ensure that you lose your precious children without being allowed to say a word !! Even if you stay calm but still show hostility the judge may appoint a psychologist recommended by the “SS” to give you an IQ test and if through nerves etc your results are poor once again the Official Solicitor will be appointed to “represent” you.Alas,thanks to him, you will be gagged, and your children will be lost to forced adoption .An article from the Sunday Times (see link above) states that 588 cases in which parents have been gagged and the Official Solicitor has given away their children have taken place in the family courts from Jan 2006 until june 2009 .

Remember that the SS often “brainwash” children in care by telling them that their mother is too ill to care for them or worse still does not love them or want them any more, but when they are adopted they will have a lovely new “for ever mummy and daddy”! These children are often traumatised for life wondering if they are evil and if that was why their mother abandoned them.Better to avoid this trauma by telling them the initially upsetting truth.Make sure you hold them tight to stop interuptions when you tell the children that “wicked people have stolen them for money and that you will never stop fighting to get them back” ! Whisper this in their ears or calmly make the statement out loud in spite of horrified supervisors who may then try to shout you down !Even children as young as 3 will remember all their lives such a brutal but necessary message. Vital however it is, as it will eventually make a stable adoption impossible to sustain !Your reluctantly adopted children will as a result seek you out and come back to you in the end !

IF the “SS” threaten to take your children for adoption,make sure they never forget you !

THIS AT LEAST SHOULD HELP TO SABOTAGE ANY UNWANTED ADOPTIONS AND MAKE SURE YOUR KIDS WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU AND GET IN TOUCH LATER .Not many “adopters” will want to take in a child who has been told to say “NO” to adoption in any case !

Once adoption proceedings have finished there is no more confidentiality ,so plaster your children’s names and photographs all over facebook and the rest of the internet together with names of the social workers and so called “experts” who have stolen your children !Make it hard for adopters and ss alike as that’s your best chance of eventually seeing your children again !The ss may seek an injunction to remove the display so it is prudent to have a third party actually put on the photos etc with your complete story on facebook,twitter,and all the other similar sites !

If you find your adopted child ‘s address or school MAKE FACE TO FACE contact immediately !Do NOT SEND EMAILS OR CARDS IN ADVANCE or make any phone calls that could warn the adoptive parents and send them to court for an injunction !Also your children were probably told that you abandoned them and did not love them so they might even avoid meeting you without finding out the truth through nervousness .For these reasons, give no advance notice of your intentions to call on them.

Google “Winona Varney” or “Von and Tammy”TO SEE SUCCESS STORIES.

6: Protect yourself against social workers with NO COURT ORDER barging uninvited into your home by fitting a small chain inside your front door. This means that if you do not unlatch the chain when you see who is calling that person would have to push the door hard enough to break the chain which would be a “forced entry “and a criminal offence if committed without a document from the court such as a “recovery order” specifically allowing entry using reasonable force. Unless they intend to actually arrest someone or have good reason to believe someone in the house is in danger of severe physical harm, police also would have to have a warrant before breaking the chain. Usually they will not have one and would have to convince a judge that a serious crime had been or was about to be committed before one was granted.

7: If social services request a look at your medical records (probably to try and find something to discredit you) ALWAYS write to any doctor or psychiatrist that has seen you as follows:

“I respectfully request you to keep all my medical notes strictly confidential as I intend to take legal proceedings against social services and any other persons who might obtain my medical details without my express authorisation”.

A parent advises re medical records

“Ian, I think it would be sound advice on your website to tell parents to obtain their own children’s records from the GP (£50 per child) rather than their solicitor obtain them ensuring that they confirm whether all THIRD party information has been shared otherwise I would not have known this as they are effectively trying to do a stitch up on the expert report. That’s my take on it anyway.”


8: Never write a letter to anyone connected to Social Services as you might include something that could damage your case in the family court. Only accept a solicitor if he/she promises to allow you a free hand to speak in court! You should be asked this simple question in the witness box “Have you anything you would like to say to the court?” Without this promise you may be “gagged” and as already explained in Rule 4 you can lose your case without being allowed to say a word!


Remember above all that your objective must be to WIN YOUR CASE ! Not to “score points”, and not to discredit social workers,guardians ,police,judges or the system itself,as these tactics though satisfying will make sure you lose ! Never be untruthful in court but never antagonise the judge by openly disagreeing with what he says even if secretly you think he is a pompous idiot !If the judge in a final care case hints strongly that you will recover your children if only you will accept the findings of fact from the previous hearing or maybe if you agree to see yet another “expert” to assess you ,then humour the judge and accept what he says ! Remember that judges finally do have authority over you, whilst social workers have none Always present your case calmly and factually based on evidence not opinions so that it becomes obvious to all that it is in the children’s best interests is to stay with you !